Simon Butcher

I've already spoken to a few people about the number of security checks I've been through, and they simply don't believe the high number of checks I've had to deal with. To prove once and for-all that I'm not exaggerating like I usually do…

1. Passport security check prior to check-in. This involved a database lookup, and I also noticed after a bit of spying that they also copy in details of other visits (stamps) from the passport into the system.
2. Passport control at Brussels airport, plus security at the entrance to the terminal. Routine stuff.
3. Physical pat-down and carry-on luggage search at the gate, an hour prior to boarding.
4. Passport control at Atlanta, which took roughly two hours I might add.
5. Baggage recheck and customs control at Atlanta
6. Security check at entrance to Concourse-E
7. Random bag inspection and wanding after four hours at Atlanta, because I appeared suspicious having visited all of the terminals in boredom.

Finding a nice quiet place to sit and read was difficult. After arriving and making it through customs, I walked from one side of the airport to the other and found a place to have a cigarette to keep me awake. Not before too long, I was surrounded by people talking about all sorts of things. At first, it was a lady talking about American Spirit, and after the arrival of a young guy and his 18-month old son the conversation quickly turned into children, education and language.

The conversation turned serious upon the arrival of a marine, heading back to Baghdad, and an extremely opinionated yet diplomatic lady from somewhere in New York. With heavy and controversial topics from war to immigration policy, it was impressive to watch the crowd increase in size, the careful reservation but eager participation, and the diplomacy presented. Lesser people would have dodged the subject or walked off in disgust once a contrary opinion was faced.

In airports, and on the flight, I started to write down some funny quotes from people I over-heard, many of which are unfortunately unsuitable for publication. I thought I'd share quotes from two people who amused me, and were clean enough to publish.

While still in Brussels, I couldn't help laugh heartily at the complete misunderstanding of typical dry Belgian humour of an American tourist, let alone her extreme reaction to the quip from a Coffee Corner guy. The woman in question was attempting to buy a bottle of water with US currency.

The guy sitting next to me on the flight from Brussels to Atlanta seemed quite obsessed with the flight attendants. The first came prior to take-off, after the third time we were asked and explained about the emergency exit door procedures: “She's nice, but geriatric”. During landing, the plane was shaking pretty violently, and the stream of comments about the age of the flight attendants was wrapped up: “Damn these planes are friggin' old, like the attendants — package deal or something, I dunno”.

Anyway, still suffering from jet lag caused by a day-flight, I'm back in the hotel tonight to try and fix my already fairly broken sleeping pattern. I think I'll just grab some food and crash like last night, and hopefully get a decent amount of morning light tomorrow.